We have nine days to buy a President

A modest proposal for staving off the Trump tariffs.

On Inauguration Day, Canadians breathed a sigh of relief when it was reported that incoming President Trump’s proposed 25% tariff would not be implemented right away.

Psych! Trump says they’ll be implemented on February 1. Maybe.

As of this writing, Canada has at least nine days to stave off an economic stomach punch, and while I give credit to our conservative provincial premiers for good cop, bad cop diplomacy, I’m not sure Trump can be talked out of this.

As anyone who’s argued with strangers on the internet knows all too well, you can’t reason someone out of a position he didn’t reason himself into, and the Mango Mussolini’s belief in tariffs is based on a fundamental misunderstanding of how they work.

Canada will likely respond with its own tariffs on American imports, which won’t damage their much larger economy as badly as the Trump tariffs will hurt Canada’s, but could cause some serious pain for red-state companies and industries which rely heavily on the Canadian market.

Cana…